With January having been so successful, I'm adding a new piece to my plate (punny!) and testing the dating waters again this month by doing two things.
1. Responding to an interesting personal ad I found on Time Out New York's website (they're doing a massive dating issue this week, which they always do around Valentine's Day).
2. Telling ALL of you- and anyone who will listen - that I am ready to date again. So, pull out your phones, open up your email accounts and start searching for non-damaged heterosexual males who would want to date someone as intelligent, funny, driven and fantastic as little old ME!
I know some of you might have a hard time finding non-damaged heterosexual males in your phone (Ahem, DSG!) but someone out there MUST have someone for me... right? right?
I thank you in advance for any nice guys you send my way :)
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Digging Deep
Sometimes, the motivation is harder to come by than others.
Last week, I stuck to my calories and went to my dance classes, but I didn't do much in the way of supplemental gym attending as I was too busy swirling in life cycle craziness and recovering from stomach flu.
Yesterday, I took the kickoff of February to get "back on the horse" in terms of the gym and headed to dance class to burn it off. This morning, I did 45 minutes of several kinds of cardio and some weight training. It took me a while to get off of the couch and into the gym, but I made it and felt proud of myself for being there and for doing all that I set out for myself. I only wish I had someone to kick my ass - but trainers are too expensive for me right now - I feel like I can only push myself so far. I need someone to scream at me and make me push harder than I push myself... Any takers out there? Anyone want to get out their aggression towards me by making me sweat and cry a la Biggest Loser?
Suffice it to say, I am exhausted now. Utterly beat. Totally tired.
But it felt amazing. On top of that, I know - thanks Lose It iPhone Application - that I have many MANY calories left today which is good news because I am off to a fancy dinner with Jen and although I won't be drinking or having dessert, it's nice to know that I can pretty much eat whatever I want for dinner.
I also thank the Lose It application for tracking my weight loss. Since the beginning of the year, I've dropped a bunch of weight already, and it's fun to update my progress and see the little line on the graph dip down as it records the losses.
Now I know - a month in - I have the calorie counting DOWN. I just need to pick up the pace at the gym. It's funny, the balancing act of it all. It's like as soon as I have one aspect nailed down, the other goes away. It shows just how difficult it is to keep all the balls in the air. But I love a challenge and I have several goals and milestones to work towards so it will be interesting to see what will happen....
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Month 1
Month 1 is over (well, nearly).
As you can tell from this past week - it's been an intense emotional roller coaster situation, but when I sat down this morning to reflect on January, I'm amazed at how far I've come in so little time.
I've become a master calorie tracker. Thanks to the Lose It application on my iPhone, I have been able to track what I've eaten and I've stayed under 1800 calories every. single. day.
I've had NO alcohol. I've had NO dessert. I've made it through a stomach flu and have made it back to the dance studio and back to the gym. I've lost more weight and I haven't felt deprived for a second.
I can keep this up, I know I can. If I can make it through this past week without acting out through food, I can surely make it through most other weeks!
So, month one is complete, now... on to month TWO!
Thanks for all of your support, both virtual and in person, I could NOT do it alone.
As you can tell from this past week - it's been an intense emotional roller coaster situation, but when I sat down this morning to reflect on January, I'm amazed at how far I've come in so little time.
I've become a master calorie tracker. Thanks to the Lose It application on my iPhone, I have been able to track what I've eaten and I've stayed under 1800 calories every. single. day.
I've had NO alcohol. I've had NO dessert. I've made it through a stomach flu and have made it back to the dance studio and back to the gym. I've lost more weight and I haven't felt deprived for a second.
I can keep this up, I know I can. If I can make it through this past week without acting out through food, I can surely make it through most other weeks!
So, month one is complete, now... on to month TWO!
Thanks for all of your support, both virtual and in person, I could NOT do it alone.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
The Circle of Life
This week isn't even over and already it's been filled to the brim with life cycle events and it's got me thinking...
Saturday, I watched Jake at his Bar Mitzvah. All self-assured and balanced and humble. Like no other 13 year-old I've ever seen. He took his place and was incredibly impressive and absolutely lovely. To think that he's already 13 and a "man", it's pretty striking.
On Tuesday, my neighbor Trudy passed away at 93 years-old. At Trudy's funeral, I was reminded of my Grandfather's life. A life well lived. Trudy had told everyone around her, myself included, that she was ready to go when it was her time. She had escaped from Germany after Kristallnacht, become a nurse in England during the war, and then come to New York for the bulk of her adult life. Trudy was always a smiling neighbor, and a neighbor ready to warn you that rollerskating down the marble hallway would inevitably end in injury (which it usually did). Towards the end of her life, Trudy was helped by the most amazing home health aide Denise who was kind and generous and offered Trudy a great safe space where she could feel comfortable enough to let go.
Trudy's funeral also got me thinking about how you can live 200 feet from someone your entire life and not know all too much about them. New York is different in this way. We all live so stacked up on eachother and yet, when you get right down to it, we're all very much alone.
With every death, however, come the new beginnings. My cousin Adam and his wife Jennifer are about to welcome their new baby girl into the world. And my sister is going to be a wife! Engagement occurred last night and she is over-the-moon. And with that, the sorrow gets brushed away for celebration and new beginnings.
Finally, another ending this week. I've never been a real pet lover, but there are always exceptions to the rule - and one of those exceptions has always been Stella. I've dog-sat for Stella since she was just a pup - rowdy and rambunctious. A lab with a heart of gold. Stella and I have spent many MANY nights and Augusts together on the couch, watching t.v., at the dog run, and in her home - both at 219 and now at 645. Stella is the first dog I've really loved and she's reached an age - and a health point - where it is time to say goodbye, and that is where I am headed right now. To say goodbye to my "old lady". But, as with Trudy and the baby and the engagement, I am sure that there will be a new puppy sometime soon in Stella's family. A puppy that won't ever truly replace her, but that will bring new life where there once was another.
Saturday, I watched Jake at his Bar Mitzvah. All self-assured and balanced and humble. Like no other 13 year-old I've ever seen. He took his place and was incredibly impressive and absolutely lovely. To think that he's already 13 and a "man", it's pretty striking.
On Tuesday, my neighbor Trudy passed away at 93 years-old. At Trudy's funeral, I was reminded of my Grandfather's life. A life well lived. Trudy had told everyone around her, myself included, that she was ready to go when it was her time. She had escaped from Germany after Kristallnacht, become a nurse in England during the war, and then come to New York for the bulk of her adult life. Trudy was always a smiling neighbor, and a neighbor ready to warn you that rollerskating down the marble hallway would inevitably end in injury (which it usually did). Towards the end of her life, Trudy was helped by the most amazing home health aide Denise who was kind and generous and offered Trudy a great safe space where she could feel comfortable enough to let go.
Trudy's funeral also got me thinking about how you can live 200 feet from someone your entire life and not know all too much about them. New York is different in this way. We all live so stacked up on eachother and yet, when you get right down to it, we're all very much alone.
With every death, however, come the new beginnings. My cousin Adam and his wife Jennifer are about to welcome their new baby girl into the world. And my sister is going to be a wife! Engagement occurred last night and she is over-the-moon. And with that, the sorrow gets brushed away for celebration and new beginnings.
Finally, another ending this week. I've never been a real pet lover, but there are always exceptions to the rule - and one of those exceptions has always been Stella. I've dog-sat for Stella since she was just a pup - rowdy and rambunctious. A lab with a heart of gold. Stella and I have spent many MANY nights and Augusts together on the couch, watching t.v., at the dog run, and in her home - both at 219 and now at 645. Stella is the first dog I've really loved and she's reached an age - and a health point - where it is time to say goodbye, and that is where I am headed right now. To say goodbye to my "old lady". But, as with Trudy and the baby and the engagement, I am sure that there will be a new puppy sometime soon in Stella's family. A puppy that won't ever truly replace her, but that will bring new life where there once was another.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Amazing.
The past two days, I've been absorbed in the world of composer/lyricist/all around amazing guy Ryan Scott Oliver. Ryan is a tremendous talent and an incredible person and did I mention his talent?
After getting to attend the sitzprobe on Sunday and both shows at Joe's Pub last night, my head has been filled with his music and his brilliance and I want to share a bit with you (and, thanks to the super nerds of the musical theatre world who upload to YouTube as fast as they can, I can do just that)!
Enjoy!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Awareness
One of the things I'm trying to work on, beyond the calorie counting, is paying attention to what my body is telling me.
When my right shoulder began to hurt last week, I slowed down the upper body weight lifting and got a massage. And, naturally, the pain went away.
Then, this Tuesday, I got hit by what I thought was food poisoning but I think now is actually a stomach virus, and I listened to my body. Rather than push through and head to the gym (which would've inevitably led to me collapsed on the floor of the gym), I slowed everything down.
I still worked for clients, but slowed down my pace.
I haven't been to the gym since Tuesday morning, and I'm okay with that. There's NO way I could have worked out.... I can barely keep myself awake and alert with the weakness and the hunger and nausea I've been battling.
Despite feeling sick, I also feel proud. Proud of myself for listening to my body. For slowing down. For remaining aware.
It's a really good sign of things to come...
When my right shoulder began to hurt last week, I slowed down the upper body weight lifting and got a massage. And, naturally, the pain went away.
Then, this Tuesday, I got hit by what I thought was food poisoning but I think now is actually a stomach virus, and I listened to my body. Rather than push through and head to the gym (which would've inevitably led to me collapsed on the floor of the gym), I slowed everything down.
I still worked for clients, but slowed down my pace.
I haven't been to the gym since Tuesday morning, and I'm okay with that. There's NO way I could have worked out.... I can barely keep myself awake and alert with the weakness and the hunger and nausea I've been battling.
Despite feeling sick, I also feel proud. Proud of myself for listening to my body. For slowing down. For remaining aware.
It's a really good sign of things to come...
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Much Better, Thanks!
Yesterday, I was exceptionally low energy until around 6 PM. I drug my feet. I inhaled and exhaled deeply.
It was a combination of several million things, but the main things were...
- Too little sleep! (too many nights out...)
- Not enough food! (still adjusting to the new low-cal way of life)
- Such depressing world news (If you haven't donated yet, go HERE or HERE)
When I dragged myself into my goddaughter's house, I got a kick in the pants that I REALLY needed from my beloved K. And realized a few things...
- I HAVE to start sleeping my 8 hours per night again. If I know I'm getting home late the night before, I have to be courteous to myself and make sure I don't have a 6 o'clock gym thing the next morning. Without sleep, I have nothing.
- I need to eat more proteins and fats. With so few calories to ingest on a daily basis, I have to make sure that what I AM eating is slow to burn and keeping me feeling satiated and less hungry.
- I need to step away from the t.v. and get active and involved. I made donations and am trying to find out what else I can do to help.
Flash forward to this morning... After a dinner with Jenny FULL of healthy sushi protein, I woke up feeling less hungry than I have since this thing started. I was also fully rested as I forced myself to sleep at 9:30 last night and slept all the way til 6:30! Being up so early, I was able to have a snuggle and a little tv catchup before heading to the gym for a lovely swim.
I'll be honest, it was hard to roll off the couch at 8 and head to the pool, but once I was in the water, everything felt better. Plus there was a bonus... on the way out of the locker room, I weighed myself and things are looking GOOD! Can't give you exact numbers - don't want to jinx it - but I can feel my body and things are definitely changing.
I've actually started to personify my own body - if that makes any sense at all - and I think of it as a machine that is working on becoming more efficient and one of the ways it's doing that is by consuming stored fat to use as fuel. It feels that much more satisfying to be able to close my eyes and imagine the little fat cells being burned. Feels good!
And it all reminds me... that any quest has to always be taken ONE DAY AT A TIME.
And now, here I am, blogging for you all... and feeling MUCH BETTER, THANKS!
It was a combination of several million things, but the main things were...
- Too little sleep! (too many nights out...)
- Not enough food! (still adjusting to the new low-cal way of life)
- Such depressing world news (If you haven't donated yet, go HERE or HERE)
When I dragged myself into my goddaughter's house, I got a kick in the pants that I REALLY needed from my beloved K. And realized a few things...
- I HAVE to start sleeping my 8 hours per night again. If I know I'm getting home late the night before, I have to be courteous to myself and make sure I don't have a 6 o'clock gym thing the next morning. Without sleep, I have nothing.
- I need to eat more proteins and fats. With so few calories to ingest on a daily basis, I have to make sure that what I AM eating is slow to burn and keeping me feeling satiated and less hungry.
- I need to step away from the t.v. and get active and involved. I made donations and am trying to find out what else I can do to help.
Flash forward to this morning... After a dinner with Jenny FULL of healthy sushi protein, I woke up feeling less hungry than I have since this thing started. I was also fully rested as I forced myself to sleep at 9:30 last night and slept all the way til 6:30! Being up so early, I was able to have a snuggle and a little tv catchup before heading to the gym for a lovely swim.
I'll be honest, it was hard to roll off the couch at 8 and head to the pool, but once I was in the water, everything felt better. Plus there was a bonus... on the way out of the locker room, I weighed myself and things are looking GOOD! Can't give you exact numbers - don't want to jinx it - but I can feel my body and things are definitely changing.
I've actually started to personify my own body - if that makes any sense at all - and I think of it as a machine that is working on becoming more efficient and one of the ways it's doing that is by consuming stored fat to use as fuel. It feels that much more satisfying to be able to close my eyes and imagine the little fat cells being burned. Feels good!
And it all reminds me... that any quest has to always be taken ONE DAY AT A TIME.
And now, here I am, blogging for you all... and feeling MUCH BETTER, THANKS!
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